Life is beautiful and it will remain as it is… as long as morons don’t end up with half-hearted feelings of ambiguity. Wondering and Pondering are two beautiful past-time of we Indians, i.e., at the end of the day we are in a deep hallucinated state of what we have done, what we are doing and what we will be doing. What-so-ever, we are proud to be an Indian at the 60th Milestone of Indian Independence, leaving enough space for few stray dogs to urinate on it.
“Yes Sir”, “No Sir” – The “Sir” is a word or something more than that… we use to show our gratitude to our elders and superiors. But, for me it’s nothing more than a Colonial Stigma, a blot which hasn’t left our mind since 1947. I simply wonder and ponder how many Indians had really been received a “Knighthood” from the Queen or is it a virus of our ambiguous minds.
In the traffic, on the road… even a rider on a LUNA or a driver on a BMW will try to overtake each other to symbolize their spirit “Hum Kisi Se Kum Nahin!!!” but both the enthusiast doesn’t know the conditions of road on which they are zooming in. On the other hand, I am just out of words for the politicians, government authorities, mass-media people and many more... that follows the concept of “Indian Crabs”. All of them carved their own initials on the banyan tree of Indian Social System. All of them are highly incorporated within the lies and super-lies which eventually give us uncountable deception points, and if you ever try to connect these points – the end result will be an unimaginable 3D diagram on an unimaginable social space.
Have you ever questioned why Indians are good in IT?? Simple answer we are good in Pointers – (quite similar to the Pointers in C/ C++). If anything happens (read it as heavenly bad) the pointer systems takes it over and at the end you get an answer based on process was bad, but very few try to eliminate the bug within the system.
At the end of 60th year, all we can say India is now having a booming economy, booming lifestyle, going-to-be-boomed government (Indo-US Nuke 123 Crisis) and booming morons. Welcome to the era of “Indian Boomerang”, an era full of morons and their “Moronic Verses”.
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Blogged Mind
Ask any netizen, what he or she does ??- blogging! under my silent lips, I always utter "Fuck Me!". Blogging is not a crime, I would rather call it a virtual-world for upcoming and downpouring writers. From many centuries we had gone through or still going through many books written by William "SexSphere" and all I can conclude, you need a Oxford's dictionary to crack some spheres out of it! William is exclusive and many writers of his era too lived with such exclusiveness. But look at the blogs, by the time you start to read you mostly end up at turning pages of your old english dictionary! and by the end you realise you had just discovered one more "SexSphere". Shelf it off!!
Blogging is all about creativity and some are or most of them quite better than regular writers. But a man like me who have a myriad mind set and an un-intentionally low on IQ, needs a simpler understanding. Every writer says - " I am a writer for mass" and every mechanical engineer says - "I hate the writers who wrote THE THEORY OF MASS TRANSFER". It's all about the perception which constitutes in our mind and later on which propogates into a divergent thinking, but all we should look at a convergent outcome (such a rarity indeed!).
Blog your thoughts, Blog your life, Blog your beliefs, Blog your society, Blog your every god damn reason of your own existance, but do it in a simpler manner, so that others can really get your point of blogging. We don't need to be a literary genius or an intellectual "guru", all we need to understand the nitty gritties of being one-self for mass.
P.S: I wrote this lines only after reading 100s of blogs on web, where I found there is a greater imbalance between the thought processes of writers and what they really pursue in their day to day lives.
Saturday, May 26, 2007
Confession
I would like to apologize from my deepest part of my heart, where blood is gushing from lower ventricle to upper ventricle with a feeling of guilt, to all my loyal readers for me going into a hibernation phase without issuing a prior notice. This particular phase was very much enlightening for me and for my surroundings. I fell in love, I jumped in love, I danced in love, I did bungee jumping in love, I did everything which were ought to be done and the good thing is I am still doing it.
I have a bunch of happenings – some are funny, some are emotionally funny, some are tragedically funny, some are horribly funny.
So,
“ Meherbaan, Qadardaan and mere jaise highly innovative shaitan. Just Get Ready – Rahulogy is Back!!”
I have a bunch of happenings – some are funny, some are emotionally funny, some are tragedically funny, some are horribly funny.
So,
“ Meherbaan, Qadardaan and mere jaise highly innovative shaitan. Just Get Ready – Rahulogy is Back!!”
Friday, May 19, 2006
Sunday Post
At this age of neo-liberalized society where we Indians are bloody confused and still we prefer to say “my heart is going garden garden (Mera Dil Baag Baag Horiya Hai)”, each day starts with new issues, which eventually ends up into a bloody mess. As a not-so-famous saying goes – “You can put an ape in a public school. But it’s not going to develop a public school accent”, is totally applicable on us. On a beautiful Sunday morning, you wake up arround 7:30 am, put on the radio at 8 am, the radio jockeys arround the country start blaring there non-stop verbal assault by asking silly questions like “ What scares you the most – a lizard or a rat?”, Forget the lizard, eat the rat. By the time you enter the toilet Himesh Reshamiya (of Sa-Re-Ga-Ma fame) cries at highest decibel through you stupid radio and his words are “Ek baar aaja aaja aajaa…Jhalak Dhikla jaaa…. Ek baar aaja aaja aajaa…” which as I believe a “Next Gen Potty-Pressure” Song and If you are suffering from loose motion (a very unfortunate condition, God forbids that), please put a plug behind or else buy a new bottle of Harpic Toilet Cleaner.
After taking a so-called peaceful shower, you hit the TV on your breakfast, Arjun Singh’s little Langot (underwear) enemies doing round of demonstrations for Anti-Reservation Status and the irony is Government’s very own three central organizations gave data for reservation requirement on pseudo-super imposed digital figures. If Ramanujam & Aryabhatta were alive, both would have lost their brains and balls after seeing the plight of Indian Statistical Sciences. Who cares? Then you decide to take a drive to your nearest friend with an over-whelming thought for having a cup of coffee at the nearest Mocha or Barista, you pick up your friend and as usually he is on Ga-Ga mode about his girlfriend. “Bhain de takke ka yeh private mater hai”, so what-> whole country is now very open. Everything is public now; even companies are going through IPO (Initial Public Offering) boom. Mumbai Dance Bar Girls Association is also looking for such option, lets hope their Initial Public Offering would be a Long-Lasting Public Offering - definitely at certain Marked Retail Price and sooner their will be new courses at IIMs like PGDBA or PGDBM – Prostitution Management (49.99% seats reserved for OBCs) with guest lectures from eminent Mumbai dance bar girls.
At 12 pm, you decide to pick up your girlfriend; she gets into your car and replaces the radio jockey. Previously you had an option to switch off the radio but what about this livewire? Forget it for your own safety and concentrate on the road for others safety. As soon as you hit the junction, a beggar comes at your window and says “Saab, aapki jodi salamat rahe… bibiji aapke ghar ko swarg bana degi” and you look at your girl’s face, she smiles back with a cunning attitude and your neurons gets activated with a thought like “Ghar ko agar yeh swarg banaaigi… toh mujhe yeh swargwasi banaigi.” You give Rs 2 to the beggar for the early warning and wish him a long live through your deepest part of your heart (As for a normal Indian Beggar life expectancy is upto 30yrs, since most of them are knocked down by rich peoples kids during their real life Need-For-Speed stunts). After the lunch you take your girl to your home, by the time you enter -> From Mrs. Patnekar to Mrs. Bhatia all have already peeped in and out! Just to make a confirmation regarding your sexual orientation - whether you are straight or not. Then starts the higher-level interrogation, your girl ask you everything, mainly whom you met through the morning. Mostly you do end up by putting an extra effort to convince her that by meeting few close male friends doesn’t makes you a homosexual maniac (Better from next time do mention about Mrs. Bhatia’s eldest daughter Saloni). Then you try to be little bit cozy with her, and she stops you and ask you – “I want an Emraan Hashmi type kiss” and your reacting words are “You want a Monkey Kiss, I thought you would have preferred a French kiss”. By the time you leave your bed, you give an honorary salute to Emraan Hashmi the Monkey; it’s because of him your Sunday is always like you have re-written the Kamasutra practically.
With the approaching evening, you both decide for a short drive to the nearest open space but eventually you end up at McDonald’s to strike of your post-sex hunger which is much more logical after bedroom warfare. Anyway here you meet the kids in red shorts, blue skirts, yellow tees like you have entered into a Disneyland, and McDee Uncle’s statue across the bench adds up as a nice topping. Then you try to give an order; 2 Mc Maharaja with extra cheese, 2 French fries, 2 extra large cokes, 2 McSwirl, 1 Mexican Chicken Pan. ……Breaaaaak!!!!! Here comes the devine voice –“Honey!! What’s happening to your appetite? Yuck, now I came to know why my sweetie has a well grown cute little disgusting tummy”, this statement is a reckoning one. Finally you end up with 1 McAloo Tikki without cheese with a glass of water and your girl enjoying a heavenly meal that also on your account. By 8pm, you try your level best to drop her at her place and with your empty stomach you drop yourself at some friend’s place. You cook some instant noodles and some baked beans, which you eat like a refugee-just thrown out of Bangladesh.
At 10pm, your friend’s opens up few Romanov Vodka Bottles and in the back ground they put on some music especially JIM MORRISION (the doors). By the time you try to collect your legs for the return journey to your heaven, you keep swinging from one end to another like a pendulum of irregular frequencies and eventually you hit the main door of your friend’s house. With a bump of size of “Vataka Vada – Stuff Potato” on your head you try to recollect the memories of the day on 6X4 feet bed. You smile in a confused manner with a belief that this same cycle of events will repeat all over again in upcoming next Sunday, with newly acquired boldness you try to prepare your mind for the tomorrow where life will get back to the original position .... same work , same people, same damn schedules and same bloody hell!
After taking a so-called peaceful shower, you hit the TV on your breakfast, Arjun Singh’s little Langot (underwear) enemies doing round of demonstrations for Anti-Reservation Status and the irony is Government’s very own three central organizations gave data for reservation requirement on pseudo-super imposed digital figures. If Ramanujam & Aryabhatta were alive, both would have lost their brains and balls after seeing the plight of Indian Statistical Sciences. Who cares? Then you decide to take a drive to your nearest friend with an over-whelming thought for having a cup of coffee at the nearest Mocha or Barista, you pick up your friend and as usually he is on Ga-Ga mode about his girlfriend. “Bhain de takke ka yeh private mater hai”, so what-> whole country is now very open. Everything is public now; even companies are going through IPO (Initial Public Offering) boom. Mumbai Dance Bar Girls Association is also looking for such option, lets hope their Initial Public Offering would be a Long-Lasting Public Offering - definitely at certain Marked Retail Price and sooner their will be new courses at IIMs like PGDBA or PGDBM – Prostitution Management (49.99% seats reserved for OBCs) with guest lectures from eminent Mumbai dance bar girls.
At 12 pm, you decide to pick up your girlfriend; she gets into your car and replaces the radio jockey. Previously you had an option to switch off the radio but what about this livewire? Forget it for your own safety and concentrate on the road for others safety. As soon as you hit the junction, a beggar comes at your window and says “Saab, aapki jodi salamat rahe… bibiji aapke ghar ko swarg bana degi” and you look at your girl’s face, she smiles back with a cunning attitude and your neurons gets activated with a thought like “Ghar ko agar yeh swarg banaaigi… toh mujhe yeh swargwasi banaigi.” You give Rs 2 to the beggar for the early warning and wish him a long live through your deepest part of your heart (As for a normal Indian Beggar life expectancy is upto 30yrs, since most of them are knocked down by rich peoples kids during their real life Need-For-Speed stunts). After the lunch you take your girl to your home, by the time you enter -> From Mrs. Patnekar to Mrs. Bhatia all have already peeped in and out! Just to make a confirmation regarding your sexual orientation - whether you are straight or not. Then starts the higher-level interrogation, your girl ask you everything, mainly whom you met through the morning. Mostly you do end up by putting an extra effort to convince her that by meeting few close male friends doesn’t makes you a homosexual maniac (Better from next time do mention about Mrs. Bhatia’s eldest daughter Saloni). Then you try to be little bit cozy with her, and she stops you and ask you – “I want an Emraan Hashmi type kiss” and your reacting words are “You want a Monkey Kiss, I thought you would have preferred a French kiss”. By the time you leave your bed, you give an honorary salute to Emraan Hashmi the Monkey; it’s because of him your Sunday is always like you have re-written the Kamasutra practically.
With the approaching evening, you both decide for a short drive to the nearest open space but eventually you end up at McDonald’s to strike of your post-sex hunger which is much more logical after bedroom warfare. Anyway here you meet the kids in red shorts, blue skirts, yellow tees like you have entered into a Disneyland, and McDee Uncle’s statue across the bench adds up as a nice topping. Then you try to give an order; 2 Mc Maharaja with extra cheese, 2 French fries, 2 extra large cokes, 2 McSwirl, 1 Mexican Chicken Pan. ……Breaaaaak!!!!! Here comes the devine voice –“Honey!! What’s happening to your appetite? Yuck, now I came to know why my sweetie has a well grown cute little disgusting tummy”, this statement is a reckoning one. Finally you end up with 1 McAloo Tikki without cheese with a glass of water and your girl enjoying a heavenly meal that also on your account. By 8pm, you try your level best to drop her at her place and with your empty stomach you drop yourself at some friend’s place. You cook some instant noodles and some baked beans, which you eat like a refugee-just thrown out of Bangladesh.
At 10pm, your friend’s opens up few Romanov Vodka Bottles and in the back ground they put on some music especially JIM MORRISION (the doors). By the time you try to collect your legs for the return journey to your heaven, you keep swinging from one end to another like a pendulum of irregular frequencies and eventually you hit the main door of your friend’s house. With a bump of size of “Vataka Vada – Stuff Potato” on your head you try to recollect the memories of the day on 6X4 feet bed. You smile in a confused manner with a belief that this same cycle of events will repeat all over again in upcoming next Sunday, with newly acquired boldness you try to prepare your mind for the tomorrow where life will get back to the original position .... same work , same people, same damn schedules and same bloody hell!
Sunday, April 16, 2006
India, the land of profanity
[The written material of this blog is very much inflammatory, so users discretions is well accepted]
“Oye Bhain Di, Hindi bolti hai?”- The opening lines spoken by Aamir Khan in Rang De Basanti has given enough explanation how the cult of profanity has gone deep-rooted into our society. Any way, few months ago, when I paid a self-surprise visit to my old school, I found many small toddlers speaking well-versed “gaalis” fluently, better we should forget about their Hindi lessons. As time has passed, the acceptability of such vocabulary has given upper hand to the people to express their feelings in a different way. Many of them believe it’s a best way to express one’s feeling in a better way. Those days had gone when people usually used such words with a grudge. They are now more polite with a punch like “ Bhain ke lode, kal phone kyun nahin kiya??”
The melancholies of such words are different through various points of views. As a musician composes a beautiful masterpiece by using various notes, the same way common junta composes their own kind of profanity based words. Elite people prefer to use English, just to prove how well they are using their high education for a perfect disposal.
Just take an example of an engineering college, a student comes out of a room after a gruesome journal submission cum viva, he shoots – “ Maa ke Lode ne aaj meri gaand maar di!” His friend on his support says- “ Gaand aur Doodh jab phat-ta hai, tab awaaaz nahin aati. Hahahaha”. Just see the flow of ideas and information! I simply can’t believe it; the system of natural human communication has evolved into such lower degree of expressions.
Don’t mind!! Even girls are also playing a pivotal role. If you don’t believe my words, just do drop by nearest hang out zone of cities like Bangalore, Pune or Delhi you will find the word “Fuck” with a feminine touch on a Play & Rewind list. So, if you ever considering to hear “Madder Chod” from a Behari, the 21st century girl in reply will shoot “You!! MOTHER FUCKER” – The instant Hindi-To-English Dictionary!!!
Relatively speaking, I don’t have any complains from this ongoing traditional change. But what so ever, the equation of being polite and to keep one’s mouth afresh gives substantial maters of doubts. Any type of mouth fresheners like Pass-Pass or Minto fresh cant do enough justice on this issue neither I do expect much from any upcoming FMCG companies. It’s all up to the personal choice what to speak and what not to speak, why to speak and why not to speak, how to speak and how not to speak, when to speak and when not to speak.
“Oye Bhain Di, Hindi bolti hai?”- The opening lines spoken by Aamir Khan in Rang De Basanti has given enough explanation how the cult of profanity has gone deep-rooted into our society. Any way, few months ago, when I paid a self-surprise visit to my old school, I found many small toddlers speaking well-versed “gaalis” fluently, better we should forget about their Hindi lessons. As time has passed, the acceptability of such vocabulary has given upper hand to the people to express their feelings in a different way. Many of them believe it’s a best way to express one’s feeling in a better way. Those days had gone when people usually used such words with a grudge. They are now more polite with a punch like “ Bhain ke lode, kal phone kyun nahin kiya??”
The melancholies of such words are different through various points of views. As a musician composes a beautiful masterpiece by using various notes, the same way common junta composes their own kind of profanity based words. Elite people prefer to use English, just to prove how well they are using their high education for a perfect disposal.
Just take an example of an engineering college, a student comes out of a room after a gruesome journal submission cum viva, he shoots – “ Maa ke Lode ne aaj meri gaand maar di!” His friend on his support says- “ Gaand aur Doodh jab phat-ta hai, tab awaaaz nahin aati. Hahahaha”. Just see the flow of ideas and information! I simply can’t believe it; the system of natural human communication has evolved into such lower degree of expressions.
Don’t mind!! Even girls are also playing a pivotal role. If you don’t believe my words, just do drop by nearest hang out zone of cities like Bangalore, Pune or Delhi you will find the word “Fuck” with a feminine touch on a Play & Rewind list. So, if you ever considering to hear “Madder Chod” from a Behari, the 21st century girl in reply will shoot “You!! MOTHER FUCKER” – The instant Hindi-To-English Dictionary!!!
Relatively speaking, I don’t have any complains from this ongoing traditional change. But what so ever, the equation of being polite and to keep one’s mouth afresh gives substantial maters of doubts. Any type of mouth fresheners like Pass-Pass or Minto fresh cant do enough justice on this issue neither I do expect much from any upcoming FMCG companies. It’s all up to the personal choice what to speak and what not to speak, why to speak and why not to speak, how to speak and how not to speak, when to speak and when not to speak.
Tuesday, January 31, 2006
The Monologue of Sex
Now that’s how the world goes on, from the days of Cleopatra human intentions has grown beyond the limits especially in terms well written guidelines of lust & desire. Eventually lots of writers cropped in and wrote thousands of pages some abstractly & some specifically - on Sex.
Kushwant Singh – a sexually frustrated sardar and Sobha De – who knows more about her servant’s sex life compared to her own are just some examples who intentionally elaborated a topic which means to be pure & private in a well constrained dimensions but as we are killing the time, they gave enough reason to kill the sex out of you. Indian Culture is highly double-minded affair where we can find people of various mindsets and different ideologies. And in such context, we generally derive unwanted conclusion like fun, jokes, irony, horror etc out of such sexual propagandas just to cash enough money & time from silly & illiterate citizens.
Sex is pious and pure but we have very few people in our midst to take it seriously in terms of its application. As we discuss, pre-martial sex in an unwanted affair in our society. Just take a look, at the age of 13-14, a girl’s sexual hormones get into production and reveals various signs showing her sexual growth and at the age of 14-15, a boy also get into action in terms of masturbation. What these things means to you? The both sexes are getting ready for the most natural operation, which is an integral part of our evolution and here we the very people are deciding the cons of such operations. At the above-mentioned ages we almost try not to reveal these cranial secrets to them, eventually they look out for other medium to enhance their own knowledge and that’s where this mater looses its privacy and becomes a public propaganda.
As we teach our kids the language of communication, we should also emphasize on the knowledge of sex as per their growing age. As much as you are going to compress the spring, it will bounce back double. In the beginning you or they might feel bad about such kind of discussion, but please believe me, a well-organized and cohesive but a private discussion in two ways direction will help them to grow naturally as per the Feud’s psychological theory.
One-Night-Stand is applicable only when you are not connected to your partner emotionally. Whenever emotions comes into play, how deeply you want an ONS, it’s eventually going to become an unwanted affair in which both the partners or one of them at least will feel guilty-as-hell in later times.
Sex is good or Sex is bad? All the answers of such kind of questions are lying inside your own head. As I feel, Sex is a clandestine mater, which should be dealt with an extreme cautious when various relationships are under consideration. Too much openness and too much closeness both are extremely hazardous. Remember Love is not part of sex; sex is a part of love. So do love first, do sex later.
Kushwant Singh – a sexually frustrated sardar and Sobha De – who knows more about her servant’s sex life compared to her own are just some examples who intentionally elaborated a topic which means to be pure & private in a well constrained dimensions but as we are killing the time, they gave enough reason to kill the sex out of you. Indian Culture is highly double-minded affair where we can find people of various mindsets and different ideologies. And in such context, we generally derive unwanted conclusion like fun, jokes, irony, horror etc out of such sexual propagandas just to cash enough money & time from silly & illiterate citizens.
Sex is pious and pure but we have very few people in our midst to take it seriously in terms of its application. As we discuss, pre-martial sex in an unwanted affair in our society. Just take a look, at the age of 13-14, a girl’s sexual hormones get into production and reveals various signs showing her sexual growth and at the age of 14-15, a boy also get into action in terms of masturbation. What these things means to you? The both sexes are getting ready for the most natural operation, which is an integral part of our evolution and here we the very people are deciding the cons of such operations. At the above-mentioned ages we almost try not to reveal these cranial secrets to them, eventually they look out for other medium to enhance their own knowledge and that’s where this mater looses its privacy and becomes a public propaganda.
As we teach our kids the language of communication, we should also emphasize on the knowledge of sex as per their growing age. As much as you are going to compress the spring, it will bounce back double. In the beginning you or they might feel bad about such kind of discussion, but please believe me, a well-organized and cohesive but a private discussion in two ways direction will help them to grow naturally as per the Feud’s psychological theory.
One-Night-Stand is applicable only when you are not connected to your partner emotionally. Whenever emotions comes into play, how deeply you want an ONS, it’s eventually going to become an unwanted affair in which both the partners or one of them at least will feel guilty-as-hell in later times.
Sex is good or Sex is bad? All the answers of such kind of questions are lying inside your own head. As I feel, Sex is a clandestine mater, which should be dealt with an extreme cautious when various relationships are under consideration. Too much openness and too much closeness both are extremely hazardous. Remember Love is not part of sex; sex is a part of love. So do love first, do sex later.
Wednesday, January 25, 2006
“Funda” “menta” “list” - India Class of 2005
World is full of Fundamentalists. There classifications can compete with Archie’s or Atrix in terms of words and pages. Any way, In India it has its very own definition which as follows:
“FUNDA” given by “MENTAL” people in an abstract “LIST” is collectively known as “FUNDAMENTALIST”
To support that above “funda”, we got our very own live examples enough to kick out the real ass out of you. So buckle up your seat belts, if you had any… or else just forget about it, after all it’s India My Baby… Just break the broken rules.
Here I am presenting a List of newly acquitted Fundamentalist of Indian System, most of the rankers were extreme backbenchers of the class, but all due to good guidance and education given by our very own UPA (Ulta Pulta Alliance) administration, they have performed par above anyone’s expectation. Bravo!!!! This is the way that India Graduates!!
Fundamentalist Rank No: 1
Awarded to: MCD Delhi
Stars: *****
CGPA: 10/10
Mental Centurions for Demolition or Municipality Corporation of Delhi all are quite same. They came from nowhere and became India’s most wanted fundamentalist by demolishing some 18000 illegal constructions in & around Delhi. They proved themselves enough to scare the shit out of local citizen’s ass.
Their Anthem of MCD: “ Main hoon Don (Delhi’s Only Nuisance)”
Fundamentalist Rank No: 2
Awarded to: Merrut Police Department, UP
Stars: ****(1/2)
CGPA: 9.98/10
If you have a sexy girl friend and dreaming for a long drive, then don’t visit Merrut (U.P). Why??? Even holding her hand will get you a free trip to a local “hawalat”. And most of the male cops will give “hawa” and lady cops will give you lots of “laat”, and as far as the bonus rewards are concerned, you will have plenty of options to choose from lucrative packages including “Solid GPL (Gand Pe Laat)” from her parents.
Merrut Cop’s National Anthem: “Chod Diya Jaye… Ya Maar Diya Jaye…Bol tere saath kya suluk kiya jaye…”
Fundamentalist Rank No: 3
Awarded to: Natwar Singh & Associates
Stars: ****
CGPA: 9.92/10
“I am not Guilty”, ok boss we do know about it… so tell me now what to do?? “Tel bech so Gaya tu… marwane bhaita tera bhooth…”
Fundamentalist Rank No: 4
Awarded to: Lucknow Police Department, UP
Stars: ****
CGPA: 9.84/10
Are you Gay??? If Yes!! You are under arrest under IPC 377. Biggest blunder of its own kind in the land of Kamasutra where being a gay in past centuries was not a social taboo.
Fundamentalist Rank No: 5
Awarded to: D.K Panda (Former IG Rules-UP Police)
Stars: ****
CGPA: 9.81/10
Kalyug’s Radha, our very own D.K Panda got famous for his lipsticks, bindis, salwars, dupattas and of course his petticoats (who can forget that…). A public “pitayi (thrashing)” by her wife and a public dance with eunuchs was the talk of the town. Great Going Panda Ji!!
Panda Ji’s Anthem: “Inhi logon ne le liya Dupatta mera…”
Fundamentalist Rank No: 6
Awarded to: Gurgaon Police Department
Stars: ***
CGPA: 9.75/10
“Eh ki Honda Hai?” The ultimate tribal dance flashed all news channels, in which Gurgaon Police Dept. Pandus used their “laathi” skills to tackle 1000+ Honda factory employees who were mere a spectator for a peaceful cause which forced Harkishan Singh Surjit of Communist India to say “ Yeh Sab Honda Hai?”
Anhthem: “ Gur (gaon) naal ishq (police’s danda) mitha…ohhh ke rabba lagne kise nu jaaweee…Oh…oh rabba ishq (police’s danda) mitha”
Fundamentalist Rank No: 7
Awarded to: Shakti Kapoor & Aman Verma
Stars: ***
CGPA: 9.71/10
“Aaaoooo Lolitaaa!!! I am trapped in your booby traps.” Yes, this is the Shakti the power to propel female newcomers to the bollywood stardom where once upon a time when public used to search heroines inside a cloth, but now the same one are searching the cloth on the heroines. Happy Searching!!! Just Google It!!! Baby
Shakti’s National Anthem: “Aaaa Aaaa eeee ooooo ooooo Mera dil na todo…”
Fundamentalist Rank No: 8
Awarded to: Preeti Jain & Madhur Bhandarkar
Stars: ***
CGPA: 9.64/10
“I got raped by Madhur”, commented by Preeti Jain with a smile on face. Amazing…isn’t it?? No Further Comment!! …Please
Preeti’s national anthem: “ Satyam Shivam Sundarm…”
Fundamentalist Rank No: 9
Awarded to: Greg Chappell & BCCI
Stars: **
CGPA: 9.51/10
Greg Chappell- Dada’s nightmare played an important innings to destroy vagabonds of Indian cricket by disposing the former captain into the trash bin of BCCI Windows Operating System. Now it’s all up to the powerful compilers to use Alt+Ctrl+Del to reboot the whole system or simply expect a total crash!!!
Greg’s National Anthem: “Nothing else maters – Metallica”
Fundamentalist Rank No: 10
Awarded to: Mumbai Dance Bar Girls
Stars: **
CGPA: 9.49/10
From varieties of bustier-low cut/deep gully-backless cholies to mini-ghahgras, Mumbai dance bar girls are now looking for other professions to enhance the skills of jhatka and matka’s from dance floors to bedroom floors. All you can expect a new wave of fundamentalism approaching inside your bedrooms where wives have to be more compeititive and ready-to-be-banged to keep these dangerous sexually over active kittens out of the authorized perimeter. So a advise to the men –“play safe”, and a advise to the women –“be the strong opponent, keep other opponents out of bay and play WILD”
Those who missed the list of top 10 “fundoos” (missed by few inches only…):
1. Fire Brand “Uma Bharti”
2. Delhi’s Godfather-in-exile “Madan Lal Khurana”
3. BJP’s pracharak: Joshi the “Sex Machine”
4. Kendriya Loh Path Gamini Mantri (Union Railway Minister): Laloo Prasad Yadav
5. Praveen Togadia, VHP
6. Salman Khan, Vivek Oberoi and Aishwariya Rai.
7. Operation Duryodhan’s MPs
8. Amar Singh & his Tap Dancing skills
9. Ekta Kapoor and Balaji Teleflims.
10. Aamir Khan’s Mangal Pandey
My words: Since for prolong years I have given lots of fundas over this blog by using my dead-meat-a-like neurons and each fundas has accumulated into the archives which you can access through your left hand side given list…these lines are quiet enough to entitle my confession as a respectable self-conclusion of being myself a self-proclaimed fundamentalist of the new genre of blog sphere. I am really thankful to each and every soul at this blog for dropping by and giving me lots good piece of advises, love, devotions and etc. Too much to say… and too less time, so cutting in short… I would like to forward my deepest gratitude through my deepest part of my heart to every single soul who reads my blog and derives the happiness from my words & from me. Thank You!!!
“FUNDA” given by “MENTAL” people in an abstract “LIST” is collectively known as “FUNDAMENTALIST”
To support that above “funda”, we got our very own live examples enough to kick out the real ass out of you. So buckle up your seat belts, if you had any… or else just forget about it, after all it’s India My Baby… Just break the broken rules.
Here I am presenting a List of newly acquitted Fundamentalist of Indian System, most of the rankers were extreme backbenchers of the class, but all due to good guidance and education given by our very own UPA (Ulta Pulta Alliance) administration, they have performed par above anyone’s expectation. Bravo!!!! This is the way that India Graduates!!
Fundamentalist Rank No: 1
Awarded to: MCD Delhi
Stars: *****
CGPA: 10/10
Mental Centurions for Demolition or Municipality Corporation of Delhi all are quite same. They came from nowhere and became India’s most wanted fundamentalist by demolishing some 18000 illegal constructions in & around Delhi. They proved themselves enough to scare the shit out of local citizen’s ass.
Their Anthem of MCD: “ Main hoon Don (Delhi’s Only Nuisance)”
Fundamentalist Rank No: 2
Awarded to: Merrut Police Department, UP
Stars: ****(1/2)
CGPA: 9.98/10
If you have a sexy girl friend and dreaming for a long drive, then don’t visit Merrut (U.P). Why??? Even holding her hand will get you a free trip to a local “hawalat”. And most of the male cops will give “hawa” and lady cops will give you lots of “laat”, and as far as the bonus rewards are concerned, you will have plenty of options to choose from lucrative packages including “Solid GPL (Gand Pe Laat)” from her parents.
Merrut Cop’s National Anthem: “Chod Diya Jaye… Ya Maar Diya Jaye…Bol tere saath kya suluk kiya jaye…”
Fundamentalist Rank No: 3
Awarded to: Natwar Singh & Associates
Stars: ****
CGPA: 9.92/10
“I am not Guilty”, ok boss we do know about it… so tell me now what to do?? “Tel bech so Gaya tu… marwane bhaita tera bhooth…”
Fundamentalist Rank No: 4
Awarded to: Lucknow Police Department, UP
Stars: ****
CGPA: 9.84/10
Are you Gay??? If Yes!! You are under arrest under IPC 377. Biggest blunder of its own kind in the land of Kamasutra where being a gay in past centuries was not a social taboo.
Fundamentalist Rank No: 5
Awarded to: D.K Panda (Former IG Rules-UP Police)
Stars: ****
CGPA: 9.81/10
Kalyug’s Radha, our very own D.K Panda got famous for his lipsticks, bindis, salwars, dupattas and of course his petticoats (who can forget that…). A public “pitayi (thrashing)” by her wife and a public dance with eunuchs was the talk of the town. Great Going Panda Ji!!
Panda Ji’s Anthem: “Inhi logon ne le liya Dupatta mera…”
Fundamentalist Rank No: 6
Awarded to: Gurgaon Police Department
Stars: ***
CGPA: 9.75/10
“Eh ki Honda Hai?” The ultimate tribal dance flashed all news channels, in which Gurgaon Police Dept. Pandus used their “laathi” skills to tackle 1000+ Honda factory employees who were mere a spectator for a peaceful cause which forced Harkishan Singh Surjit of Communist India to say “ Yeh Sab Honda Hai?”
Anhthem: “ Gur (gaon) naal ishq (police’s danda) mitha…ohhh ke rabba lagne kise nu jaaweee…Oh…oh rabba ishq (police’s danda) mitha”
Fundamentalist Rank No: 7
Awarded to: Shakti Kapoor & Aman Verma
Stars: ***
CGPA: 9.71/10
“Aaaoooo Lolitaaa!!! I am trapped in your booby traps.” Yes, this is the Shakti the power to propel female newcomers to the bollywood stardom where once upon a time when public used to search heroines inside a cloth, but now the same one are searching the cloth on the heroines. Happy Searching!!! Just Google It!!! Baby
Shakti’s National Anthem: “Aaaa Aaaa eeee ooooo ooooo Mera dil na todo…”
Fundamentalist Rank No: 8
Awarded to: Preeti Jain & Madhur Bhandarkar
Stars: ***
CGPA: 9.64/10
“I got raped by Madhur”, commented by Preeti Jain with a smile on face. Amazing…isn’t it?? No Further Comment!! …Please
Preeti’s national anthem: “ Satyam Shivam Sundarm…”
Fundamentalist Rank No: 9
Awarded to: Greg Chappell & BCCI
Stars: **
CGPA: 9.51/10
Greg Chappell- Dada’s nightmare played an important innings to destroy vagabonds of Indian cricket by disposing the former captain into the trash bin of BCCI Windows Operating System. Now it’s all up to the powerful compilers to use Alt+Ctrl+Del to reboot the whole system or simply expect a total crash!!!
Greg’s National Anthem: “Nothing else maters – Metallica”
Fundamentalist Rank No: 10
Awarded to: Mumbai Dance Bar Girls
Stars: **
CGPA: 9.49/10
From varieties of bustier-low cut/deep gully-backless cholies to mini-ghahgras, Mumbai dance bar girls are now looking for other professions to enhance the skills of jhatka and matka’s from dance floors to bedroom floors. All you can expect a new wave of fundamentalism approaching inside your bedrooms where wives have to be more compeititive and ready-to-be-banged to keep these dangerous sexually over active kittens out of the authorized perimeter. So a advise to the men –“play safe”, and a advise to the women –“be the strong opponent, keep other opponents out of bay and play WILD”
Those who missed the list of top 10 “fundoos” (missed by few inches only…):
1. Fire Brand “Uma Bharti”
2. Delhi’s Godfather-in-exile “Madan Lal Khurana”
3. BJP’s pracharak: Joshi the “Sex Machine”
4. Kendriya Loh Path Gamini Mantri (Union Railway Minister): Laloo Prasad Yadav
5. Praveen Togadia, VHP
6. Salman Khan, Vivek Oberoi and Aishwariya Rai.
7. Operation Duryodhan’s MPs
8. Amar Singh & his Tap Dancing skills
9. Ekta Kapoor and Balaji Teleflims.
10. Aamir Khan’s Mangal Pandey
My words: Since for prolong years I have given lots of fundas over this blog by using my dead-meat-a-like neurons and each fundas has accumulated into the archives which you can access through your left hand side given list…these lines are quiet enough to entitle my confession as a respectable self-conclusion of being myself a self-proclaimed fundamentalist of the new genre of blog sphere. I am really thankful to each and every soul at this blog for dropping by and giving me lots good piece of advises, love, devotions and etc. Too much to say… and too less time, so cutting in short… I would like to forward my deepest gratitude through my deepest part of my heart to every single soul who reads my blog and derives the happiness from my words & from me. Thank You!!!
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